A Letter to My Daughter: My Story of ReBirth

To,

My loving Daughter,

You know you are the cutest thing I have in this world. Today I want to tell you that you have grown me up as a mother. It’s strange to say but its true from the core of my heart.

The day we got the good news that a smallest living cell of you is floating in my body, it was the prettiest news. Though I didn’t have that much idea about being mother but I was really happy. Gradually, I begin to feel you inside me and with each day I’d gone through several mental and physical conditions which were new to me.
In each trimester, I tackled some new hormonal changes. Every now and then, I felt nausea, I vomited out and then felt hungry as hell.
None of the favorite dresses of mine befitted into me. I got habitual of cramps, backaches, headaches, swellings and acidity. Pillows and books were my new friends by the time and music overwhelmed my soul when your dad was on official trip.post-97-1448820446
By the last trimester, I gelled up with you so much that I used to feel your wants. I got to know when you kicked me for hunger, when you kicked with joy of listening rhythms of music I used to hear. That’s the time when you had occupied my whole world.

You know, you were so active and energetic that you’d kicked me 15-120 times in the 15 minutes of scan. I had a very healthy pregnancy with a good weight gain for 18 kgs. It was not so easy to walk with that much load in my last days of pregnancy.

In the beginning of 9th month there had been sudden health issues of high blood pressure, colestasis, increased level of SGPT which made me suffer with a lot of acidity.12744655_1692115477711510_5240661052394413299_n I hadn’t been able to eat much those days and finally doctor called me for pain induction. I asked her to delay it for a day because my mother was about to come that day and I wanted her badly. That day when I met my mom and I hugged her after a very long time, I felt her pain as a mother. How she would have gone through all this while giving birth to me.

And Finally the day came when I felt that excessive bone stretching labor to give you birth. Your Dad and My Mom were my moral support at that time. I tried a lot but at the stretch of 8 hours, my blood pressure reached the heights and the only way left was to operate.

I had seen the face of your Dad, he was too nervous at that time. I was taken to the OT and Surgeon asked me to sit for a while for anesthesia injection in my spine. He said after that I will feel no pain but actually since that point of time my spine hasn’t leave that pain yet. I felt that push when they took you out of my tummy and you cried.

That was the first time I smiled with tears. I can’t explain the happiness I felt to get you. They congratulated me for the birth of a baby girl. I still remember they said,” Congrats Ma’am you delivered cute 3.6 kgs baby girl at 3.19pm”. I saw you and kissed you.mom-baby-hd-wallpapers Then, they took you to nursery for taking care. I had few postpartum complications technically known as postpartum hemorrhage. I was bleeding like never before. They took me to ICU and I had been under observation for whole night. Overhearing the doctors, I got to know that it is somewhat getting critical. They were discussing about the fresh blood pouring out of my body which was unstoppable.

I was alright to bear the labor pain but now it wasn’t that bearing to me. It pained so much when they used to clean out my body after every 10 minutes. I told my doctor that I can’t bear it any more and she consoled that she will not let anything bad happen to me. My family and friends outside the ward weren’t able to enjoy much happiness because your Dad and Granny (My Mom) were tensed for me. mikalah-and-me-hands-780x500

Then, I was taken for the minor surgery and with the help of suction pump they cleaned all dirty blood. I was all pale now and they checked and found that I need blood donors for me. At that needy time, your Uncles (your father’s friends) helped us a lot and at last my life was saved.

I was thirsty from last morning and still I couldn’t have a sip of water because they had injected drips of Blood and Glucose in both of my wrists. After 2 days of struggle when I was shifted in my private ward. I met everybody and then they brought you back from nursery. I was dying to take you in my arms. I never knew that it can be this much love to somebody whom I’ve never seen before. All congratulated me for the birth of baby and My Mom said. “Congratulations on your Rebirth as a Mother”.

By each passing day I’ve felt that not only you are growing up but I am also growing up and grooming up myself as a mother. From the improper latching to co-sleeping with you. Deep inside my heart I still feel that it was you for whom I am alive otherwise I would have died. It’s indeed a new life as a mother to me and so, It was my Mothers Day in true sense. 13062307_1605404843111169_8528644105663075564_nI have learnt a lot about you and also I have come to realize the efforts of my parents how they may have gone through this phase. I have a great love and respect for my mom and dad from always but by the time I have started as a parent, it has increased more a bit. I often realize how difficult it would have been for our moms to do each and everything without so much technology and facilities. Here, I feel so stressed out while changing diapers, cooking in microwave and washing clothes in washing machine. How mom would have done all these chores at that time.

On this Mother’s Day, I just want to convey this message to you that you are all what I have an asset. One day you will also go through the same phase as mine and I promise you to be always there for you. Nothing can be as special as mother-daughter relationship. We learn from eachother. As, I take you up to the path of graces and you take me down to relive my childhood.0ac53f2870d42d8c31e31eb0bb28f456

 Thankyou my lovely little Angel, it’s because of you that I got myself evolved as your “Mumma”. 

With love,

Maa

8 thoughts on “A Letter to My Daughter: My Story of ReBirth”

  1. Happy mother’s day supriya.Very tuching sttory.God bless u keep it up.isiliye kahte hain ki putr kuputr ho skta hai lekin mata kbhi kumata nhi hoti. apne bachhon k liye vah her dard sah skti hai.

  2. U have written a real live and full of love experience to ur choti shaitan.it was very deficult time to us when all these was happening with u. Ur letter is so touching.I feel more trouble due to every time my eyes are full of tears.but u are now a mother of cute one shaitan. Happy Mother’s Day.

    1. And I think that’s why I feel ..She is a precious gift of God to us 🙂 Thanks for the lovely comments 🙂

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